New School, New Problems.

Halo folks!

Long time no post. Tonight I wanna tell you about my school life. It has been OK, though. OK. I laugh, a lot. But I'm not sure if I have fun. It takes longer to fit in than I thought, but I believe there's still hope to actually fit in. There's hope. Hope. "It is the only thing stronger than fear." said President Snow. I can't believe that quote helps me a lot. So movie-ish but true. You know I go to the school with the best students from all over Jakarta, so I have some problems with scores and the other stuff. First, I was soooo vocal and pretty good at public speaking. But now...... I laugh every time I talk. I can't pick the right words when I talk in front of the public. I go with random words and start to talk about random stuff. Gosh I embarrass my self all the time. But that's what I do. I embarrass. -___- I gotta get rid of this habit or syndrome or whatever. I'm gonna re-learn about public speaking, not public laughing. (My friend said that I'm good at it, public laughing-_-) Second, I'm losing my leadership. I've always been that girl who is picked as a leader. But now...... Nobody trusts me to lead! Because may be I always laugh and can't be serious. I know I can. But the more people say or act like I can't, my mind and body starts to believe that I can't! I gotta fix this or I will lose it forever. It should be in my DNA somewhere! And then, my academic stuff. I'm starting very slow. Very. I feel dumb at times. But, that is exactly what I need. To feel dumb. If you feel smart, you will stop learning. But if you feel dumb, you will keep learning. They call me Dory, that blue fish from finding Nemo. They call me that because I process so slow. But in the end, I'm the one who gets Marlin to his son. I am the one who remembers it all, P. Sherman 42 Wallaby Way, Sydney. I fail all the time, but that is exactly what I need. It is the fuel to my rocket that soon will launch to outer space. Leaving you people, then spread flower seeds on Mars, and lay on them once that grow. (?) They won't ever  but I have the hope that they will. :)) The point is, it's not about how you start, it's how you finish.